5 Key Teachings: STANDING AT THE EDGE, by Roshi Joan Halifax

TRANSCRIPT:

I keep going back to Standing at the Edge by Roshi Joan Halifax again and again. it is beautiful through and through. She talks about these “Edge States,” this idea of good action, things we love culturally and throughout society, and when they tip over into being toxic. So for example, she talks about how altruism can turn into pathological altruism. How empathy can slide into empathic distress. Integrity—that when we engage or witness acts that violate our sense of integrity or justice or beneficience, moral suffering can be the outcome. “Respect can disappear into the swamp of toxic disrespect, when we go against the grain of values and the principles of civility.” And engagement in our work can lead to burnout. So it’s the upside—these incredibly important instincts—and then what happens when they cross an edge. I foudn the part about altruism really important particularly right now. And what her book asks us is, “Altruism that is sourced in fear, the unconscious need for social approval, the compulsion to fix other people, or unhealthy power dynamics easily crosses the line into harm.” It’s really important to think about this, I try to consider it daily.

I wrote about this more here. I also made videos about The Five Gatekeepers of Speech and the Drama Triangle, which Roshi Halifax touches on.

5 KEY TEACHINGS:

1. Sometimes falling into disrepair and decay is the greatest opportunity for growth—particularly if we allow it fully.

As Roshi Halifax writes: “Thinking about the destructive side of the Edge States, I recall the work of Kazimierz Dabrowski, the Polish psychiatrist and psychologist who proposed a theory of personality development called positive disintegration. This is a transformational approach to psychological growth based on the idea that crises are important for our personal maturation. Dabrowski’s concept is similar to a tenet of systems theory: living systems that break down can reorganize at a higher and more robust level—if they learn from the breakdown experience.”

2. Our conception of altruism is often false, mired in a desire for “spiritual materialism,” or to feel good about ourselves—it’s important to root our altruism in a type of selflessness.