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Thinking about the mantel, I realized how much I envy the way goofiness feels like a playground men often seem more free to inhabit. It taps into a kind of humor—what I’ve always thought of as ‘boy humor’—that feels universally accessible in a way that ‘girl humor’ sometimes doesn’t. It’s something I’ve noticed since childhood. Even back in elementary school, I saw how boys could be silly and irreverent in a way that earned them camaraderie, while girls often stayed tethered to being thoughtful, serious, or composed.

Maybe that’s part of why the mantel resonates with me—it invites me into a space that feels lighter and more carefree, something I don’t allow myself to visit often enough. I crave laughter, but it often feels elusive in my everyday life, like I’m too caught up in serious study or self-reflection to let go.

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Though I do see what you’re saying, my sense is that the male podcasters you speak about are ruled by scarcity. Scarcity is deep within the culture and our collective psyche. It’s an energy of fear and underlies the impulse to control … and in relation to what you’re talking about amass followers, keep out competition, etc. They are manifesting the very energy they are ruled by. It makes me think of Monsanto and their project to engineer seeds that cannot reproduce. That project is a child of scarcity that creates scarcity in the world.

For me, the bigger question is, how do we disentangle ourselves from/uproot this deep programming of lack and scarcity and not enoughness? How much of it is about engaging with institutions of scarcity to try and dismantle or reform them? And how much of it is about the deep internal work of uprooting it within ourselves?

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